Countdown

oh my friend, we're older but no wiser
for in our hearts the dreams are still the same

The intimate stories that we shared, the private thoughts we whispered - as the year draws to a close today we will carry our dreams into the new year...

hello 2009.

Days of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas, I did nothing much of anything except try to recover from the Night before Christmas.

On the second day of Christmas, I braved the shopping crowd and went into town to have a late lunch with a special friend and ally from the bellydance clique. We spent the rare occasion catching up with girlie gossip and left each other reinforced with the certainty that we righted every wrong.

I even felt brave enough to do a home hair colour job on my tortured hair which has turned a truly yucky yellow-orange. My hair is now a less yucky violet red if any body wants to spot me by hair colour.

On the third day of Christmas, my mother rang. There went my feel-good of the season for the day. Dang!

Christmas of Friends and Family

The Christmas season holds no religious significance for me.

Rather, it has always been a time for remembering special friends and family. For spending some personal time with those special people in my life, and knowing that things are going well for them. For seeing out a year that has been lived with grace and goodness and looking forward to the promises of the next.

But more often than not, I would end up trying to meet the demands and expectations of work and family, taking it upon myself to make sure that everything and everybody is taken care of. The season then becomes an annual exercise in surviving a month-long marathon of rushing from pillar to post. On the outside, I am the very picture of Christmas itself, idiotically cheery in giving of my time and self. On the inside, I'd like nothing better than run away from it all.

This time around, things went just about right at every turn. I had the chance to meet up with different friends separately under circumstances that suit their particular preference. A quiet dinner at home with new parents with infant, intimate coffees and lunches with the girlfriends, family outing on parents' day with friends and their pet, a hafla or two in there to meet up with a very special breed of friends.

And on Christmas eve, family dinner at home which included friends with their grown children who are visiting for the holidays.

Every occasion was memorable. Every one was special. Every greeting of well-wishes was sincere.

Making the time to celebrate friendship and family - this, for me, is what makes Christmas a special time of the year.

Holiday greetings

Thinking of you
and wishing all good things
come your way

Have a happy holiday season!

It's a dog's life

The days ahead leading into Christmas and New Year's is going to be a trying period for me.

On a whim, I asked to tag along with suziewong on her "family" day. I am fully aware it is an extremely precious and private day for this very busy professional so I was very grateful when she said yes with no hesitation.

We went to a part of Singapore I have not been to in decades. I recognised nothing of the area. Where there used to be nothing more than small family farms alongside unpaved dirt tracks, the place is now developed into a residential, recreational, light industrial and small business district.

We met at Ah Boy's boarding home, and after a quick bath for the happy mutt, we took off to spend the late afternoon at a prawning facility nearby. The hours spent there were so blissfully peaceful - a content dog asleep at our feet while we sat by the prawn pond with baited fishing line hopeful for a small catch for the day. It was all about a little quiet time and alot of catching up between friends.

We caught nothing. We basically fed the prawns with the bait. But by the time we left, people and pet were rejuvenated in spirit and soul. More ready to deal with the week ahead.

This is the life - even if it is a dog's life. Even if it is just for one day.

About a special friendship

Friendship in any form has to be one of life's greatest gifts. And friendships form oftentimes in the least expected of ways.

I first noticed the young woman about 5 years ago at a couple of bars that featured open mikes. She and I continued to run into each other like that over a 2 year period. We said hi, we sussed up each other with mild interest, we shared mutual friends (and non-friends), but we never really got further acquainted beyond this very casual level.

Just as casually, we stopped going to these bars. So for a while there, we lost sight of each other, in a manner of speaking.

We picked up each other's trail again from our blogs, and a curious thing happened. I feel I have a better understanding of this person's soul, a deeper appreciation of her intellect, and an unshakeable respect for her integrity through her writing.

And just when I thought I have all the insight that there is to have, she surprises me one more time - she snail-mailed me my Christmas card with a personally penned note! Which I find such a charming and gracious tradition of the season.

So, I am moved to let her know how much I appreciate the friendship forged in our unconventional way.

And may you and yours have more "ups than downs" in the new year too.

Kebab Nite@Potpourri

(click on image for larger picture)

Just when we were wondering what to do on the weekend post Christmas and pre New Year's between two haflas, Potpourri and Stephanie came to our rescue.

This promises to be another unforgettable evening of exoticism - drinks, kebabs, shisha and Stephanie.

I-S said so too! So there!

I attended the recent opening of this restaurant. I have been looking out for reviews of the place because I am interested to know if anyone else feel the same bad vibes I did.

I stumbled upon I-S magazine's review this afternoon. So, for those special friends who share my shameless morbid fascination and salacious curiosity about Pyramisa's future after being treated with sordid contempt we did not deserve, read their review here.

I am just sooo impressed with the veracity and honesty of this insightful review.

I feel righteous vindication about saying all the bad stuff after the shabby treatment they gave me.

So there!

Hafla all the way

Belinda's hafla @ Blu Jaz has returned. The upcoming party will be on Saturday 20 December.

Claribel will host a potluck bellydance party on New Year's eve, 9pm to 2am. I can't think of a better way to ring in the New Year.

Flamenco pena @ Los Tarantos

Flamenco circle @ Los Tarantos

Los Tarantos, the fruit of a labour of love, opened its doors last night, as a flamenco haven for all flamenco lovers. Housed in a beautiful Peranakan shophouse, Los Tarantos celebrated its opening with Flamenco y Tapas, a Flamenco pena in which friends and family gathered in an intimate setting to celebrate the beauty of Flamenco with their way of song, music and dance.

Los Tarantos, December 13, 2008

It was a night of festividad. There were so many things to rejoice in this single gathering: the opening of Los Tarantos as a studio and club for flamenco enthusiasts, celebration of the flamenco culture, and maestro Antonio Vargas turned 68.

I have always been in awe of flamenco with its fiery temperament and haughty posture complemented by strong hand flourishes. I admired all this from afar.

The love and passion for flamenco is palpable last night as friends and family danced, laughed and shared the special night.

And for the first time, flamenco came alive for me.

Los Tarantos is located at:
No. 1, Lorong 24A, Geylang Road,
S.398525
Contact: Daphne tel 97420637
email: daphnehml@pacific.net.sg

I'd like to teach the world to sing

After all these years, the "I'd like to buy the world a coke" ad still makes me want to sing along with it.

And I recall a time when I truly believed that harmony - racial, religious, cultural - was possible. The year was 1971.

I look at the headlines these days, and I wonder what went wrong?

This is the 1984 Christmas tree version:

I'd like to buy the world a home
and furnish it with love
Grow apple trees, honey bees
and snow white turtle doves

I'd like to teach the world to sing
in perfect harmony
I'd like to buy the world a coke
and keep it company
(that's the song I sing)

I'd like to teach the world to sing
in perfect harmony
I'd like to buy the world a coke
and keep it company
(It's the real thing)

Zambra, Gypsies and Dance

I was never big on fusion belly dance, but since attending a workshop on Zambra Mora conducted by Flamenco maestro Antonio Vargas, my mind has opened to the fact that fusion adds a whole new dimention to any dance.

I managed to find a short 45 sec sample of the dance Zambra here. There is also a beautiful heavily Indian-influenced drum solo @2.50.

Specifically, I love the genre of belly dance that is Spanish-Arabe performed by the gypsies, like the dance shown below - Danza Fusion Oriental/Gitanos (Fusion Oriental Dance/Gypsies).



I am looking forward to seeing the Zambra Mora performed by Hsiao Min on opening night at Los Tarantos on December 13.

Some evenings are like that

One recent evening ...

Strange how I never realised he talks too loudly with too-frequent punctuation of projectile laughter at nothing funny. But then I had never been around him outside of the bars. And now we are in the girlfriend's home where she had organised what seemed to be a reunion of her favourite barfly uncles.

As the night progressed, he got more and more garrulous, now dredging up names of nefarious characters he remembered while in an inebriated state in the hazy past. I soon gave up trying to be sociable for the evening and left early.

Another recent evening ...

Strange how I never realised she never talks again after the initial hello's. But then I have never been around her outside of a family dinner environment at her sister's home. and now we are in a fancy restaurant having pre-dinner chit chat over cocktails.

By the time we got seated for dinner, her brain had totally shut down so that now she was furiously fluttering her perfectly mascaraed eye-lashes to make her come across as interesting. I soon gave up trying to be sociable with her and turned my attention to the person seated on the other side of me.

Maybe I am already weary from too many get-togethers.

Maybe there are a lot of people who should never be lifted out of their comfort zones - barflies should be left at the bar, home-bodies should be left at home.

Maybe I should just switch off brain, disengage mouth gear and be nicely dumb. There are 3 full weeks more of December parties to get through.

For Kamariah

Kamariah has been keeping vigil by her husband's side for the last couple of days. The lovely, generous and kind man will not be with us much longer.

Those of you who would like to send words of comfort to our dear friend in her hour of sadness, please email me (sinlady@gmail.com) or sms me for her contact number.

I am so sorry, Kamariah.

THIS is a PARTY

There's a party goin' on right here
A celebration to last throughout the years
So bring your good times, and your laughter too,
We' gonna celebrate your party with you

Kool and the Gang

The girl knows how to throw a party. She gave the party-goers plenty of everything - food, drinks, laughter and lots of fun.

Most of all, she gave of herself. Throughout the night, she was hostess, singer, dancer, emcee, all the while making sure that we were having a good time.

The cast of talents - family, friends, students and colleagues - made for an unforgettable night of music and dance.

I thought it was especially touching when mother and daughter shared the stage. We can certainly see where the birthday girl got her singing talent.

Well, girlfriend - you gave us a night to remember for a very long time. We hope that you had a fun night too.

November

was the month
- It finally feels natural not having work days in the week.

- I got acquainted with the zambra mora in workshops conducted by the world famous Flamenco master Antonio Vargas. I fell completely under the spell of this beautiful strong dance genre that has its roots Spanish and Moorish gypsy traditions.For Flamenco enthusiasts, the good news is that Antonio Vargas now has a studio in Singapore.

- The women friends looked me up for coffee chats in between their shopping-filled days. It feels so much like the old days as I realise with amusement and tolerance that we are still the same person after all these years. Just less inclined to disagree because it takes too much energy.

- I got around to clearing out the guest bedroom which became the default store room from too many months of non-use.

- The friends have started to call about the holiday get-togethers. I like the frank forward planning and co-operation from this group of people.

- Two special friends had big "0" birthdays. One turned 40, the other 30. They start a special chapter in their lives. I find it hard to believe I followed the ups and downs and twists and turns of their personal and professional lives for almost ten years! So auntie of me *haha*

- I take a deep breath as I look at getting through December, my least favourite month of the year.

When tragedy strikes

We share the grief of her family, friends and colleagues.

We are acutely aware that it could have been any of us, could have been any number of loved ones in our lives.

We feel the anguish and anger of decent people the world over who condemn acts of terrorism.

But please, can our national paper please stop referring to her as Singapore's first terror victim? I find it objectionable that the nation's obsession with being first and best at the finish line should be extended to a victim of senseless violence.

And they will love again

They have, in their separate lives, found love, won and then lost.

In their separate ways, they were trying to re-build their lives.

Somewhere during their individual journey to recovery, they met.

They each have their strengths and weaknesses; they have different hopes and fears. They opened hearts and minds to each other and made the brave decision to go the rest of life's journey together.

I finally see them in their home, see the life they are building, meet the supportive friends and family they have.

I know they will be alright - they have found themselves in each other. And they will love again.

The real story of the Lion King

Of all creatures in the animal kingdom, the lion captures the imagination of alpha males of the homo sapiens species.

The lion is handsome guy, big and powerful. He is served by the females in the pride who do the hunting and raise his cubs. The King spends most of his days laying on his back, soaking up the sun and airing his balls. This is the life, and the natural roles for males and females.

But that's just half the story. The lion king chases out the male cubs when they are half grown, who then join other lone males to form bachelor bands. These young males now cruise the land, looking for a pride to take over from the established male. There will be skirmishes, and usually the old boy is able to scare off the boys by posturing and growling. But eventually, the boys will actually engage the old lion and in the confrontation that follows, the old boy will likely be injured and chased out. He usually dies soon after from starvation because of injuries which make hunting impossible.The young victors will then fight among themselves, and the last one standing is now king of the pride.

What follows is gruesome - the new male proceeds to kill the cubs; the females are not strong enough to successfully defend their young. Now the young king has truly established himself as king of his pride, and a new batch of cubs will soon be born. And life goes on until he grows old and is in turn challenged by bachelor bands to dethrone him.

I love telling this story at dinners where there are insufferable male chauvinists. Yes, the lion pride epitomizes the natural order of gender roles. Heh.

Year end season

I have been out doing plenty of recce work lately - checking out the stores, happening events, makan places. No, it's not specifically for the year end holiday season. It is so I know where to take the relay of visitors I will have over the next two months.

I am not good with seasonal shopping crowds to begin with. At this time of the year, the endless Christmas tunes make me go ape shit (pardon me language, but I can't think of another word).

Oh, all versions of Yuletide music - traditional, pop, jazz, R&B, cheena, cheesy, children. Everywhere, playing on and on mercilessly in a loop. In shopping centres, on the streets, in Korean BBQs, in hawker centres. I really can't take much more of this.

I have to consider ear-plugs to see myself through the season.

Oh Bah Hum Bah.

I do love the decorations and lights though. Maybe I'll make it through cheerfully enough yet.

Individuals as couples

I used to hold the view that a couple are just two individuals in a relationship. Therefore the deeds, words, behaviour, or viewpoint of one should not be presumed to be binding on the other.

I have since changed my stand.

If the one has unacceptable traits, and the other never protests or apologises for them, then the only logical conclusion is that they share the same values, that the one acts, speaks, thinks the same as the other.

The earlier stand is an intellectual notion conceived by naive expectations of a young forgiving mind; the latter is harsh reality brutally driven into the conscious by the experience of life and passage of time.

p.s. I miss being young and dumb.

What I Say, What I Think

Case 1

she (on phone) : We have not heard from you for so long. I suppose you are busy.
me : Not busy at all. You must have been busy.
she: Yes. Been so busy. Been travelling so much. Times now so hard. I cannot retire like you. I have to save $5 million before I can think about retiring.
me : Oh, like that you have to work very hard for a very long time more.

My real thoughts: Oh go on. No one can save $5million.

Case 2

she (after dinner) : You guys make the most fantastic arrangements. I don't know how you do it.
me: Just pick a restaurant, phone friends, go. You can arrange the next one.
she: Oh yes. I will, I will. We really enjoy doing things with you guys so much.
me: We hear from you soon then.

My real thoughts: I am not holding my breath. Would have asphyxiated long time ago.

Case 3:

she (via sms) : Hi. Have not seen u guys in ages. Been busy?
me : Not busy at all. U dropped out of sight saying u very busy.
she: Sigh. Yes, move office then business slowing down. Then my son had to change school because he diagnosed with aspergers. Wish I not so busy. Do u see (so-and-so) and (so-and-so).
me : So u still busy and yes, I see (so-and-so) and (so-and-so)
she: Sigh. We have been dropped from everybody's radar. I guess we are no longer useful.
me : When were you ever useful to anyone?

My real thoughts : when were you ever useful to anyone?

One day, when I am really old enough to be excused for being cranky, I will say what I really think all the time. That day may not be so far away.

On going natural

I did the Californian thing when I lived there. I did the beach thing, the pool thing, the suntan thing. I was gloriously tanned year round. But the combination of sun, sea and chlorine did serious damage to my once beautiful thick black tresses.

Sun-bleached and chlorine-stripped raven black hair is like sickly reddish brown burnt straw.

The hair dresser suggested I coloured my hair aubergine to give it depth. I loved it. So I carried on colouring my hair in the burgundy, violet, plum hues.

Well, colouring does its share of damage to hair too.

I did a drastic hair-colour thing in June - I had strips of hair totally bleached and then streaked in violet. The highlights were glorious.

Then they started to fade about 2 months ago and turned an HDB-auntie orange. I could not decide what next to do, so I left it alone. I also skipped the touch-up session because my hair really felt tortured.

I though I would "go natural" for a while; take a break from the tiresome demands of beauty regiments. I thought of the girlfriend who said she would not colour her hair anymore once she retired from work. I asked how much grey she has now. She said unflinchingly, "About 50%".

I realised I did not know how much grey I have. I coloured my hair before I had grey hair, and had kept it up. So, during this rest-the-hair stage, I found that I am about 20% grey. I am alright with that.

I also saw the shock on my girlfriend's face at lunch; she could not take her eyes off the now white/dull black/brown/HDB orange mess on my head. I could just see the questions in her eyes. "Are you alright? Is everything alright? You can tell me, you know."

My resolve to go natural vanished right then. I did a small touch up job to cover the white and black roots and will consider torturing my hair again soon.

I cannot do natural. I don't have the courage..

A very personal decision

We are soul mates and lovers. We conquered the twin obstacles of distance and time. We are finally together living our lives as we have always wanted to.

There is no need for the legal status marriage. That we have both been married before and know that the best of intentions can be attrited over time by divergent goals makes us skeptical about the institution of marriage. That piece of paper cannot keep two people together when they do not want to be; it most certainly cannot make the two love each other more. It just makes it difficult for the two to separate and get on with their lives.

So we would have been blissfully happy to carry on with the status quo, building a beautiful and meaningful life together. Over the years, we pooled our resources and capabilities. Over the years, the wealth (quantitative and qualitative) we accumulated became greater than the sum of its parts.

Then a chance reading of inheritance rights got us to thinking about legal protection. We hated the idea that at the worst possible time in either of our lives, that family has the right to challenge provisions we have made for each other.

So, quietly, on a beautiful sunny day some time ago, with just the two requisite witnesses who are the closest of friends, the man and I got married.

And nothing has changed. Not the way friends who always thought we were an old married couple viewed us; not the foes who are still waiting for bad things to happen to us, not the way we go about our lives.

There is poetic beauty in the simple clarity with which we made our decision.

Junk Mail

Ooooh...I really detest how my particulars get sold to mailing lists.

I picked up this highly time sensitive correspondence from this rag mag that just will not die. Wah, the envelope says adult signature requested, and registered tracking number XXXX some more, then it gets dropped by regular snail mail. Duh??

The letter goes:

Dear Ms (my name),

Please don't discuss this letter with anyone.

In your hands are exclusive documents that not everyone, including neighbours of yours in (my address) is eligible to receive. You, Ms (my name) are the one and only person in all of Singapore who can use your 6 non-transferable Prize Draw Numbers imprinted on the enclosed form for your chance to win an instant cash transfer in the amount of S$200,00.

ya da ya da ya da. Two full pages later,

If we don't hear from you by the stipulated closing date, any chance of transferring funds to your bank account will be lost.

This has been a private correspondence.

Sincerely,

(rubber stamp signature of person named below)
Florence Wu
Director, Sweepstakes Committee

I have made their private correspondence public with you. I guess I will never be one of the prize winners now. Might as well toss it into the trash bin along with all the other junk mail. Oh dang!

Arabian Nights@Marrakesh

Belinda says:

A storm is brewing

the monsoon season hovers
even as we bring you
Arabian Nights@Marrakesh

Come dressed Arabic style
and join dancers and drummers
for the rain dance

It is happening on 27 November (Thursday)
8.30pm - 12.00am

Reality check

I don't deny my looks matter a lot to me.

I was a great looker in my day with a few beauty titles to my name oh all those years ago.

But the years march on. And the years can be cruel to womenfolk. I am not a young woman anymore, although I still turn heads on occasion (for the right reasons still, thank you.)

So I tell myself these last several years that when three young people - strangers - call me auntie in the span of one week, I will go for that face lift.

I discount the silly China sales girls, ok? What do they know? So that said, I am grateful the auntie test has not happened.

But what has happened is that several people have asked if I have put on weight recently. I have. The sweethearts followed that observation with "but you look good. You tall enough. Better don't be too thin when we get older. Or else face get wrinkled."

Sigh. I will HAVE to shed a few pounds. Then, if people start telling me I look wrinkled, I will consider that face job.

A new word

... has just been added to the Urban Dictionary.

Use conservatively or liberally.

It's happening

"Change has come..."

I'm OK I'm OK

It was a scary episode.

Tests by the ophthalmologist showed that I have bilateral visual field defects with normal IOP (intraocular pressure).

Accordingly, an MRI brain scan was ordered to eliminate all suspicious possibilities. The result: No MR abnormaility is detected in the orbits, anterior visual pathways as well as in the brain. There is no MR evidence of infarct or space-occupying lesion in the brain. In other words: no tumour, no stroke.

Additional comment: Mild prominence of CSF (Cerebral Spine Fluid) space in the optic nerve sheaths noted. Clinical correlation for any papilloedema is advised. In other words, the distortion of my eyeballs from a lifetime of high myopia has created a space in the optic nerve membrane, and this is the cause for the visual field defects. I am to be checked on a periodic basis for any change in this condition.

My episode of severe double vision was due to a decompensated squint which I likely brought upon myself for lying on my side to read in bed. Note to self : will read lying on my back only henceforth. And I will be OK.

Another fascinating fact about my brain gleaned from the scan: In the brain, the gray-white matter differentiation is preserved. In other words, my brain is intact. I am more OK than I thought possible. Wow!

October

was the month

- i started my blog two years ago.

- with the most bellydance-filled days and nights I have had in a very long time.

- I met two bloggers who have been corresponding with me for several months now. One is exactly as I imagined, the other isn't. But it was totally rewarding to finally meet them and I know it is the beginning of good friendship.

- two distasteful women who I thought were out of my life re-surfaced. I am determined that they remain far away from my thoughts and my life.

- the sun suddenly set on the financial sunshine of some of my friends. I worry for them.

- I find I have scant sympathy for the cry-babies who are only poorer compared to a few months ago, but who otherwise suffer no financial damage in any real sense.

- I had a medical scare but am sure that it will be something minor that can be managed without any drastic change to my life. Conclusive diagnosis is expected early next week. In the meantime, I am more focused about how good my life is and am happy with everything about it.

- I feel the end of the year drawing closer.

for Halloween

Belioz's Symphonie Fantastique
for your Halloween enjoyment

of Halva and Hafla

I have been researching sooji halva (otherwise, semolina pudding). Recipes are easy to come by, and most go by the ratio of 1:1:1:4 of butter:semolina:sugar:liquid. All sources say the dessert is good eaten cold or warm.

Most people prefer cold desserts to warm, especially with our climate. Take heed that the sooji halva made from the above recipe will set into a very thick unattractive and unappetizing gooey lump. After numerous unglorious tries, I find the best proportion is 1:1:1:8. For a dressier version, I'd skip the sugar, and make a syrup (lemon-, rosewater- or vanilla-flavoured) for adding to individual taste at time of serving.

This simple-to-make dessert was a big hit at dinner parties over the Deepavali weekend :)

Elsewhere, Belinda's tribal themed hafla was a big hit with the crowd. The performers put in a lot of effort to prepare for this.



The use of fire in their dance upped the spectaculo-quotient several notches. I feel like we celebrated the festival of lights in our own way:)

p.s. The next hafla by Belinda at Blu Jaz will be on Sunday, November 9.

p.p.s. November 9 date for hafla is cancelled. For updates, please check here.

I sseee ddouble

of everything the last three days. Like every face on television has 3 eyes.

Life as I knew it was becoming difficult eg I have difficulty figuring out where the extra fingers go on the typepad. Depth perception is also altered, so I can forget driving for now. I don't remember a time when I could see well without glasses or contact lens, but this latest vision problem is something completely out of my experience with poor eyesight.

Opthalmic tests today determined no glaucoma, no retinal tear, no neurological deficit. I am thankful for that. Likely cause of double vision is a decompensated squint in my left eye.

I have follow up tests next week to rule out any other ocular or neurological causes.

I am already trying to imagine an eye patch as an accessory...

p.s. I am not receptive to alternative course of management, so please do not make those recommendations even though I deeply appreciate your concern.

Don't say I never show you

... pictures by mkop of the recent opening of Egyptian themed restaurant Pyramisa.

A gala night and that woman

The gala event was to start at 7pm. That woman (i.e. the organiser) wasn't even there. The place was a third filled. No drinks were proffered; we all just sat at our assigned tables making polite chit chat, noticeably uncomfortable in the cavernous function room made worse by the barely-there air-conditioning.

Sometime before 8pm the woman made her grand entrance - every bit like the proverbial bad fairy gliding on halcion-induced oblivion in her black robe. She declared the evening started by informing the room that she was caught in traffic but she rushed and so here she was (finally). Oh was I ever so impressed with her public relations skills at that moment.

Everything about the evening was simply off the mark:

- There was the late start caused by the the organiser's tardiness.
- The evening started with 2 lovely dancers who held everyone's rapt attention.
- The mood of enchantment was abruptly broken when the emcee announced that we now please get to the buffet line for our food.
- No sooner had we returned to our table than the show resumed. (What's the rush?). Most platters were left untouched for the rest of the evening.
- The pressure was on the two international performers to carry the evening, since the other two highly publicised talents did not show. (No reason given; it was as if they were never scheduled in the line-up).
- And as clumsily as the evening started, it was all over.
- The time was 10:00pm.

My deepest respect goes to all the dancers for giving their everything in their performance. Especially our special friend who danced on our table (you know who you are; thank you for making the evening extra special for our table).

But I must voice my grievance about the gala event: when two out of four star draws failed to show, and no mention is made of it prior to or through the whole evening, I have to assert that there is something fraudulent about the marketing of this event.

A restaurant opening and this woman

I must have a short memory. I have forgotten about the extremely absurd and bizarre nature of this woman.

So when the bellydance girlfriend got all excited about the grand opening celebration of an Egyptian themed bar-restaurant and managed to get me an invitation, I agreed to go.

Only to be told at the door of the restaurant by the woman that this opening celebration is for special invited guests only. Of course the girlfriend's name could not be found on the guest list. I waited outside till the girlfriend showed up to talk our way back onto the invite list.

For my readers who are curious about the event :-

- the place got over crowded in the extreme (so much for special invitees only)
- the crowd was an enthusiastic lot of the happy bar drinking type
- forget the promise of a generous buffet spread - we subsisted on exactly 1 cheese puff, 1 buffalo wing and 1 samosa each
- the bar crew were going full hilt the entire time, so the girlfriend and I hung on to our 1 drink for the entire 2 hours that we stayed, quenching our thirst by sucking on every last ice cube left in our glasses
- the bellydancers were generous and gracious with their stage time, as always
- the rest of the time was taken up by a talkative emcee, audience games and a snake charmer. To be fair, the audience participants were great sports with dance and acting talent,
- from where we sat/stood, the girlfriend and I only caught bits and pieces of what went on on stage. A glimpse of wrist, a wisp of hair, a quick peek of red hip belt.

We left when the segment drew to a natural close and adjourned to a nearby restaurant to collect our senses. This competitor restaurant was an oasis of civilization to our frayed nerves.

We never went back to find out if there was a second segment to the evening. We had to shore up our energy to face another of the woman's events tonight.

October hafla by Belinda

Another exciting night presented by Belinda
at Blu Jaz on 25 October.

On his turning 50

His was one of the best big 5-0 birthday bashes I have been to.

He gathered his favourite people from all corners of the world - family, childhood friends, good neighbours, colleagues, business associates. He threw a party which is more about letting these people know he is happy to have them in his life than about having people show up to see him turn 50.

We came away feeling we understood so much more about him in this one evening than all the years before from the company he keeps.

May he meet many more good people who will become life-long friends in the years ahead.

These bad times

Every year around this time, the girlfriend comes through Singapore from Los Angeles for a day's layover before continuing to Kolkata.

Every year, I'd meet up with her for a long lunch, catch up on news of my friends back stateside, snap some quickie pictures of her and me, do some impulse shopping, and I'd see her off at the airport. Later in the evening, I'd email the pictures to the friends with a short message, saying how I'd really wished they'd been here too. And every time, I'd hear from them within a couple of days, all thrilled and excited with the news and pictures.

Not this time. It's been several days now, and no one has written back yet.

I had asked after them; specifically, I had asked how badly hit are they in this financial meltdown. The girlfriend said everyone is reeling from the financial fall-out, and fearing for the worst. It has to be bad because they have fully retired from employment for between 5 to 10 years. They would have sizeable amounts of their money in managed funds.

Their silence now screams calamity to me.

I feel so so bad, and worse that there is no help I can offer. Worst of all, I don't know when things will start to look up and feel alright again.

A weekend of Magdy el Leisy

Claribel gave us another unforgettable weekend of workshops with Magdy el-Leisy. As has become his signature style, the master teacher shared with us the world of belly dance that is filled with joy and humour.

Ever gracious, Magdy always takes the time to pose for those keepsakes pictures at the end of every session.

We will always look forward to training with Magdy whenever he is in town.

September

was the month

- we decided we will not be travelling anymore for the rest of the year. Seven trips in eight months is really over-doing a good thing. It was to have been Qingdao via Beijing in October.

- I started hula dance lessons; I love the the dance form.

- we picked up on the pig-out sessions again, and have been back to the newly discovered Zi Yean four times in the month. I sense burn out on the way, and soon.

- we made the decision to catch up with friends as often as we can for the remaining months of the year.

- we came home.

Selamat Aidilfitri

A lovely evening of cross-cultural celebration with Malay food from our non-Malay kitchens.

At our dinner table were friends who are recent arrivals to Singapore. They were delightfully fascinated with the intricate tastes of Malay-style food - a totally new culinary experience for them. Looking at how they readily tried all the alien- looking and tasting dishes in front of them, I know they will take to living here well.

I am happy to be one of the first locals to introduce them to the local food scene.

he mele no lilo

Indulge me. I just love this song :



There is this really cute children's version :



Then the version I'd love to dance:



... and now I can't stop the song playing in my head...

Pig-out@Zi Yean Restaurant

Of late, the pig-out friends are having a hard time coming up with places to, well, pig-out at.

Our old reliable standby, Moi Kong, is closed; the entire building is undergoing massive renovation. Our other kitchen is closed and waiting for renovation to be completed at a yet-to-be-disclosed new location.

I don't include the big name restaurants in our pig-outs because there really isn't any surprises in those places. On reputation alone, one already expects impeccable service, opulent ambience and spectacular food.

Rather, we delight in finding low-key restaurants that would turn out some outstanding dishes. If the food is truly out-of-this-world divine, we would even put up with noise, over-crowdedness and untrained wait staff.

One recent foray turned out to be a delightful discovery. Food was decent, service was efficient and the place was not noisy!

Two of their dishes deserve special mention:

- their fried la mien had a beautiful wok hei aroma that woke up even jaded taste buds

- their 3-flavour fried chicken was skilfully done with different fragrant peppers and finished with a distinct citrus note

Zi Yean Restaurant is located at
Blk 56 Lengkok Bahru, #01-443
S 150056
Tel: 6474 0911

My old neighbourhood

I grew up in East Coast Road and Katong,

My memories of the place will always be
- the school where the sea waves lapped up against the fence,
- three cinemas within walking distance of each other,
- Roxy laksa,
- coffee houses in shopping arcades where the girls swooned over boyfriends of the week while gobbling up sundae banana splits,
- seafood restaurants in rest houses,
- cozy homes with carefully tended gardens,
- and tree-lined quiet avenues.

I rarely go near the area once I left it. I hear of the developments and changes over the years, but I never experienced it. The place grew up and became a stranger while I carried on with my necessary journey of breaking away from ties that bind too tightly.

A handful of times a year, I'd find myself making my way to my old neighbourhood to visit friends, have lunch, and look in on family.

Today was one of those days.

Visited an old friend who recently moved to Bedok.

Had lunch at Bedok Market Place.

Met the newest addition to my growing clan - my nephew Thadeus.

I feel no nostalgia for the East coast area; I recognise very little of it; I have gotten away.

One of us is from Mars

I rarely see my dance mates outside of their dance classes. Now that I am imminently leaving them, I decided to join them for coffee.

For whatever reason, I told them the following documentary I saw on TV some time back:

The date was October 15, 2003. The first Chinese astronaut was to be shot into space in a capsule. On D-Day, there he was, in space suit and all, at his send off attended by all the very important people involved with the Chinese space programme. It was a grand ceremony as befitting the occasion. Among the well-wishers were the astronaut's wife, in her whatever uniform, and their son who looked about 8 years old.

The historical moment neared. The wife said her goodbye to beloved husband by sticking out her right hand for a farewell handshake. The astronaut husband shook her hand, then turned to their son and stuck out his hand. Son shook father's hand.

There was no show of any emotion (excitement, anxiety, something, anything).

Eleven hours later, in the control room, the same very important space programme people and wife and son were waiting expectantly for a tele-conference with the man in his capsule in space. The man came on the screen. Some static, and then audio connection was made.

First words out of her mouth: "Ni hao mah?"
He: "Hai hao. Ni ne?"
She: "Wo men do hao. Ni fan xin"

Again, no show of any emotion to indicate the two people are anything to each other!

The coffee group turned thoughtfully silent. Then one uncle opened his mouth and said, "I don't get it. What are you saying is wrong?"

Stunned, I looked around the table. The others clearly shared his perplexity.

Despair gripped me in the gut like a vise at the same time that crystal clarity seized my brain: one of us is from Mars, and it isn't any of them.

afterthought : what planet are my readers from?

footnote: for historical accuracy, read the segment on China's first piloted space flight here.

Two haflas and a hula dance

I made my way to the haflas on my own, knowing I'd meet up with the usual suspects. I decided not to bring my camera. I wanted to just kick back and enjoy the performances instead of peering through the lens on the lookout for photo-worthy shots.There were many videos and cameras going. One of the videos appear here.

I am truly happy for Belinda and Claribel that their haflas were very well attended. There were many many new faces, always an encouraging sign for this small community. And then there were the familiar faces - a heart warming show of support for friends who put in so much effort to bring these events to the bellydance circle.

The weekend also turned out to be rewarding in a personal way. A chance conversation with a fellow bellydancer uncovered a little known hula dance class available in a studio downtown.

I was looking to stop social dance for a while; I am not having a good time at salsa with the uncles and aunties.

The hula class will be an ideal substitute.

I don't know what to expect, but I am hoping it will be this.

Noise and more noise

Chinese restaurants are noisy. But there is noise, and there is noise.

I put up with boisterous adults celebrating too enthusiastically because I have to. If I must, I put up with wait-staff who clang and bang the crockery around when clearing tables.

But I finally had it with children running all over the place screeching and shrieking in their horse-play.

I stomped up to the offending child ring-leader and yelled at him to cease and desist. The helpless maids minding the unmindful children were embarrassed. The adults who own the noise-monsters looked up with a what's-your-problem-with-our-cute-playful-children expression, but did nothing more. I glared at them with poison darts in my eyes and venom in my heart.

But, the noise assault dropped immediately to a more acceptable level.

I know I will not hesitate to act exactly the same way the next time. And the next time.

Weekend of Haflas

click on picture for larger image

Belinda's line-up of performers for her monthly hafla in September at Blu-Jaz Space promises to be a strong cast. Read more about it here.

Claribel is holding an open house and hafla on her premises on Sunday, 14th September. More details here.

Bali and Paul Ropp

We made our short 3-day turnaround visit to Bali for the Paul Ropp sale. Like we have done faithfully twice a year for the past 3 years.

This is, sadly, too many times for too many years. There is no new exciting clothing or accessories to be had this time. We spent 2 days going through the inventory. Still, nothing.

What saved the trip was the chance meeting of new friends. I have a good feeling about this couple. Time will tell.

We decided that we will skip Paul Ropp in February next year, and think carefully about the big sale next September.

Yes, something has changed in our love affair with Bali and Paul Ropp. So so sad...

The Paul Ropp annual sale

3 - 8 September 2008

I'm so there already.

August

was the month

Styx river, NSW

that whizzed by too quickly.

So many things I did not get around to doing ...

A baby and potluck dinner

She is now a new mommy. And she is finally ready to have people over to see her new boy.

The friends got together over a simple potluck dinner. It was almost like pre-baby days. Only almost.

The baby really is a good little fella who slept through most of the evening, waking only with mild protest that he should be fed too. And once obliged, he quickly fell off asleep again.

The friends carried on catching up with each other, almost like the old pre-baby days. Almost.

Aboriginal musicians

I don't usually pay attention to "native" sounds, but this pair of aboriginal street musicians caught my attention. That they were friendly and encouraged photo-taking, even posing with tourists, added to the joyful mood.

I ended up getting their spirit of the land CD - a compilation of didgeridoo on techno phunk.

All dressed up

and I have places to go

Mirror, Mirror

He flatters me.

Blue Mountains - Jenolan Caves

I see my light come shining
from the west unto the east
Any day now, any day now,
I shall be released

Light at the end of the tunnel - oh what a wondrous sight - as we start on the homeward leg of a very long day trip by bus to Blue Mountains and Jenolan Caves.

Like, beh tahan to sit bus so long you know?

We gave up the idea of a day trip by bus to Hunter Valley.

We confined our exploration to Sydney and its suburbs.

To market, to market

The thing to do on weekends in Sydney is the weekend markets.

I managed to do Paddington, the Rocks, and Paddy's.

I expected really funky, arty, creative, unique stuff. There was very little originality or cleverness for sale.

My precious find is this boho 2-layer sari silk wrap that I am able to wear 100 different ways. I have worked up my way up to No. 3.

It will keep me entertained till the next shopping spree.

Life's a beach

Bondi (top row) is brash.
Bronte (bottom row) is beautiful.

They are among the most breath-taking beaches I have been to in the world.

I am not usually given to wanting a home by the sea, but either of these two beach towns could change my mind.

Go on - Bite Me

It's got taste. It's got style. It's got attitude. It's got funk.

The Bite Me burger is definitely not your ordinary quarter pound beef patty hurriedly slapped onto a hamburger bun .

I am amazed at how the lowly burger can be elevated to cult gourmet status.

Bite Me Burger Co is located at
340 Oxford St, NSW 2021
tel: 61 2 93311916
and
108 Campbell Parade
Bondi Beach NSW 2026
Tel: 61 2 93006566

Go on - It's Lebanese again

Dinner at a middle-eastern restaurant is still what I look forward to on the weekends.

For the food. For the ambience. For the bellydancing.

Even if it is for all of 15 minutes.

We made it to Abdul's and Hannibal's this trip. Yes, they are next door to each other. And yes, we went to one on Friday and the other on Saturday.

Abdul's Exotic Lebanese Restaurant is located at
563 Elizabeth St
Surry Hills, NSW 2010
Tel: 61 2 96981275

Hannibal Lebanese Restaurant is located at
557 Elizabeth St Surry Hills, NSW 2010
Tel: 61 2 96988288

Go on - what's for dinner?

I love the pulse of Sydney. Especially within the CBD where we stayed. Many places of interest, eateries, shops are within walking distance. Public transport is easily available for access to places that are not within walking distance.

The problem is that the pulse stops too early for visitors like us who are used to the Asian city lifestyle, where the action never stops. In Sydney, they roll up the sidewalks by 7.

We are on holiday. We move late in the day. We wake about 9 in the morning. We do a self-catered big breakfast of eggs and bacon. It is only at noon that we are finally ready to step out of our room.

We next feel like eating about 3 in the afternoon. No way we want dinner till well after 8.

In Sydney, the shopping stops at 6. The food courts prepare to shut down at 5. Restaurant staff are twitching to throw you out at 9. We refuse to change our holiday timetable, and we refuse to be rushed at dinner time. So, we never made it to any of the fine dining establishments.

We made it to many Chinese eating places though - the food at some more forgettable than others - because they stay open much later. We even stumbled upon a Sichuan restaurant that served up the real thing, as oily and unpalatable as what we had in Chengdu!

This post is dedicated to the food experience that I'd like to delete from my memory bank.