My lousy friends
I don't readily think of many people I know as my friends. Those I do call "a friend" are precious to me - people I trust, love and care about.
Then, I have this category of people that I have finally come to call "my lousy friends". I still care about them, and I will still happily see them when they come calling, but I would not devote too much time and effort to figuring them out.
One such friend is currently visiting Singapore. So we know we have limited time for each other. We made plans for dinner. She changed her mind when something more interesting came along, and she did not bother to tell me till I looked for her the day before our date. When was she going to tell me? Was she even going to tell me?
Another had been asking me to visit her at her new location abroad. I always felt sort of bad that I was not terribly interested in that country. Now that I have the time and finally mustered the courage, I wrote to say I will gladly come visit within these 2 months when the weather there is still pleasant. I have not heard back from her in 3 weeks. Was she going to wait till the summer sun scorches the desert sand before she tells me then is a good time, knowing I will not go then?
I see no reason the first one could not have just sms'ed me to say there has been a change of plans. And the second one to just tell me now is not a good time to visit her.
Actually, I do not know what's going through their minds or what is happening in their lives. In spite of this lapse in social etiquette, I still think they are good people. And in time I will get over my peeve..
For now, I can cope with their bad form by just thinking of them as "my lousy friends".
9 comments:
Never attribute to malicious intent what you can attribute to plain laziness. Hahahaha.
Like me. I'm damn lazy.
Sorry if I've been a lousy friend! 8p
Hmm... every one has their slips I guess. I know I slip up sometimes. And I have friends like that too. I just accept that I won't see them very often, or sometimes, I'll just let them initiate.
jmalkavian - haha. so am i oftentimes. and you're not. yet :)
wildgoose - yup yup we all do. lousy friend still friend mah haha
sinlady: i'm quite anal about that too. once i know someone is like that- i.e dont' reply mails and all, i don't cut them any slack. they go right down my list. they're not in my exclusive priority club. i expect the same sort of professional efficiency even frm friends in social things like that. it says alot about one's character.
imp - thanks. now i know i'm not being overly ngiao. you also hit the nail on the head - it does say a lot about one's character.
yah i agree with imp... people who dont reply to emails are just plain weird! how difficult is it to reply to mails? if that is so tough already, we can just forget about really meeting up to catch up.
edpj - really leh. and in my case, i am talking about getting on a plane and going to see the friend somewhere in the north african desert! now really no nid :)
So value attribution doesn't apply here? Sometimes friends just need reminders.
wildgoose - what's value attribution?
the two cases i griped about here were for specific replies within a specific time or else nothing will take place.
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