Christmas past and present

I enjoy the Christmas lights, the festive mood, the sudden rush to see friends before the year closed, the exchange of presents, the outpouring of kindness in thoughts and deeds to everyone.

This time, for the first time in many years, I go back to two special people who are no longer around to make Christmas the cheery season that it is.

The grandmother in Bakersfield who baked her special rum soaked Christmas cakes for so many people. I remember especially her three young grandchildren ripping into the Christmas presents; the tinsel, ribbons and gift wraps quickly covering the floor.

And the man who always put up the best Christmas decorations and tree that he could for his grown children and young grandchildren even when they were not by his side for Christmas.

While I gather the family and friends for Christmas revelry, I am also thinking of loved ones who I shared Christmas with all those years ago.

And I am grateful to have them always, if only in my memory anymore.
 

Night of Wine and Dine

Bottom left picture - from left:
Pathy (sommelier, Table@7)
Daniel Chathiard (owner, Chateau Smith Haut Lafitte)
Eugenia & Karl (owners, Table@7)
Clinton Ang (owner, Cornerstone Wines)

It is a stretch to find me at wine-pairing dinners. For the simple reason that I am allergic to alcohol.

But because it is the folks at Table@7 who asked.

And because we have fond memories of our dinner at the Chateau Smith-Haut Lafitte.

We went.

It was, of course, another thoroughly enjoyable evening at our favourite restaurant, with some of our favourite people in the F&B industry...

Cabaret - the video

Here are the pictures.

Here is the video:



Thank you, photographer and videoman, for capturing the night.

I treasure the memory.

Mooncakes and more mooncakes

Mid-Autumn Festival. Zhongquijie. Lantern Festival. Mooncake Festival.By whatever name, I love everything associated with this seasonal festival - the celebrations, the myths, the mooncakes! Especially the mooncakes.

There is definitely no shortage of variety and versions here. Creativity and imagination run amok as restaurants, hotels and pastry chefs promote their idea of a new and improved mooncake with new and different flavours, fillings, textures, even shapes (!). Somehow, I think of these re-invented mooncakes as experiments. Oftentimes, quite horrific failed experiments even.

In the end, I really want my mooncake as I have always known it.

With the familiar baked skin complete with its imperfections because a pair of hands worked on it. With the smooth lotus paste filling, just this side of too oily and too sweet.

Rolled up in a stack of 4 on plain white paper contrasted against Chinese Red and Gold decorative prints. Or packed in no-frills boxes of 4. And all stacked into brown paper bags carrying the company name.

In my books, the three masters of old-school mooncakes are (listed in no particular order):

Tai Thong Cake Shop
35 Mosque Street
Tel: 6223 2905

Chinatown Tai Chong Kok Confectionery Hue Kee
122 bukit Merah Lane 1 *01-62 Alexandra Village
Tel: 6270 8994

Tai Chong Kok
34 Sago Street
Tel: 6227 5701

His BigSixOh

On the occasion of his bigsixoh, we threw the best birthday dinner party we knew how.

Not for this man the usual grim and glum food and drinks with the folks, young and old. And talk about the good old days.

Because the good days are not in the past. It is in the here and now.

And so, with the support and help of talented friends, we got ourselves a night of

*fine dining ( Table@7),
*great wines (private collectors),
*mesmerising bellydance (special appearance by G)
*dazzling burlesque-cabaret show (my fabulous showgirls),
*memorable keepsake of the night in pictures (amiphotography)
.
I'd like to think that the fun and friendship will last for a long time after the party is over.

I know I will remember all of you. Especially the friends who made it possible.

SinLady, Happy Birthday

Sometime in my early 20s, I stopped celebrating my birthday. I learn to avoid mentioning my birthday so that over the years, people start to forget about the day.

It isn't that I don't want to celebrate my birthday with friends; I just find it terribly awkward to walk into a party that celebrates ME.

I took to looking up certain special people in my birthday month, and ask them out for a quiet dinner or coffee. To have some "only for ourselves" time again. Some sort of renewal and re-affirmation of all that is good in our lives, you know.

Because of the recent sad medical news of father, I have been keeping a low profile this time. I just do not have the energy or enthusiasm to look up anybody. I had in fact cancelled a few engagements because I didn't want to put a damper on our meeting. You know who you are, and I appreciate your understanding. I will see you again in happier times.

But, some friends gave me a birthday do anyway. And to you, I say Thank You. For the friendship you give me. For the thoughtfulness you show me. For the happy times to remember.
p.s. check out what's written on the cake! I love it!!!

The school friends

Many batches of visitors came through Singapore these past weeks. Some were friends from long ago, some were friends I got to know in recent years. Some are not even friends in any meaningful sense of the word; others are people I knew from long ago and wish I never met.

Then there is this very special small group of women from the earliest school days. There is a lot of shared history among us. We have seen each other through heartbreak days, harrowing experiences, and celebrated the little victories in between. These days, we only meet up when we have an old friend visiting. Those occasions are few and far in between, and I treasure every moment of the little time we have with one another before going about our lives again.

I often think I might like for the ones living here to get together more frequently. But we never tried. Because I think it is precisely because these opportunities are rare that they become all the more special.

And so, until I see them again, I will remember the open laughter and conversation we shared this one afternoon.

The big dinner

We do three big dinners in the year for the friends and family: the Chinese New Year round up, Christmas and New Year's Eve.

After many trials and errors with choice of food and mix of dinner friends, we more or less have our act together.

The huge spread of food got to the table with minimal hiccup, and the humans got along nicely.

There was even a little surprise birthday celebration thrown in the mix!

It was a lot of work, but we got a lot of help from the friends throughout the evening with putting away dishes, refilling drinks and making merry.

And so it came to pass; we had a grand time celebrating the first of three big festivals of the year.

The friends, the family, the food, the drinks. Everything was right.

CNY - Hanging in there

Day by day, life returns to normal, as we reluctantly or gaily let go of the forced frenzied grip that is the Chinese New Year holidays.

The dance aunties return to their dance classes with tales of woe that beset them the week before.

Seeing the detestable relatives whom they avoid the rest of the year. Stories of frightful elders who are unhappy with the size of their ang pows. All the busy work that went into sending the gods back to the heavens to report on the good conduct of the household. All the anxiety to welcome the gods back in style and splendour. Frustration at raised prices of everything before the New Year that are not coming back down after. Tempers flared at long queues for bak kwa at inflated prices. Only for their effort to be dismissed by ungrateful recipients who say that bak kwa from another long queue is better.

Hang in there just a bit longer, ladies. It will all be over on the night of the 15th (that will be the Thursday of the 17th of February for the confused angmoh chek philistines). I expect a collective sigh of relief from the long-suffering.

Until the next go around on 23 January 2012.

The Chinese in me?

The rounds of meet-ups and catch-ups aren't done. The baking duties aren't done. And I am not complaining. I am actually enjoying all these activities, and of course, seeing the friends.

I am careful about not over-doing the merry-making during the ang moh year-end holiday season. I never embraced the oft-touted giving spirit of the season or the notion of starting a brand new year with renewed hopes and goals at the end of the month-long binge drinking.

For the Chinese one, I am happy to go the extra mile. I don't complain about the tong tong chang music that fills the air. I smile at the garish red and gold decorative what-nots. I am intrigued by the fuss and fluster that go into making sure the multitude of deities-in-residence are happy in every household.

I have roles to play out for the Chinese New Year. The ones I don't like, I junk them altogether where I can. Where I cannot, I compromise to where the annoyance is minimal. The rest I gladly fulfill.

I think *gasp* the Chinese in me is showing. And I am happy about that.

December

was the month
filled with festive cheer and celebration.

I coped well with the cooking and baking duties for the many dinner parties by refusing to over-extend myself. I was surprised, and then pleased and grateful, that I stayed pain-free through the busy month of cook-by-day and party-by-night.

I am happy to see the friends who took time from their block-leave for coffee. I am happy to have time with friends who came through here on their holiday tour of Asia. And I am happy that on the last day of the year, I was with friends and family to see another good year out, and wish for them that the new year will be good to them.

And somewhere in the back of my mind, I am aware that I have not seen or heard from Mother this whole month. And then, as quickly as the thought came to the fore for the moment, it got pushed right back to oblivion.

For this shall remain the month of festive cheer and celebration.

for auld lang syne, my dear

I've always liked Auld Lang Syne, even if I usually hear it belted out with too much gusto by drunk and tone-deaf people in the wee minutes into the New Year.

This is the beautiful old folk song given the right treatment:)



... for auld lang syne, my friends...

Christmas cheer

This has been a really beautiful holiday season for me.

So many things went right for so many special people. I was there when it happened - the initial look of disbelief, the gasp of delight dispelling the disbelief, the beginning of tearing in the eyes, then the happiness and wonderment carried in the laughter and crying, the little gift in hand.

I want many more people to have this experience - the joy in the giving and the receiving of a small something that means so much.

It is what this season is all about.

Have a good one, everyone of you.

So this is Christmas

So this is Christmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
And so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young

John Lennon, 1968

What girls want

It was an evening of much food, drink, and celebration; three young men in the family had birthdays within a week of each other.

Understandably, the conversation was mostly "young" - decisions about school courses, early days at work, strategy on how to get ahead in life. It was refreshing to hear them chart the course of their future with unabashed enthusiasm and confidence.

Sometime in the evening, the conversation turned to a topic that must be so much more significant and mysterious at this stage in their lives. The guys asked of each other and the girls: "What do Singapore girls want in a guy?"

The guys (typical) then went ahead to list what they knew the girls wanted:
- Someone who will be there for them.
- Money has to rank somewhere up there.
- A hunk, a brain, and something or everything in between.
- etc

I have to admit I never wasted time in my brave young days pondering what I wanted in a guy, or what a guy wanted in a girl. I was with whoever fitted my needs best at the time.

I never asked for or needed promises of forever and ever and a day. Those were just words. Relationships are a lot more straightforward than people allow them to be.

The girl wants the same things as the guy. And the relationship that works is one where those requirements are met.
I 'll drink to that gem of an insight. And you guys should too.

Still a birthday dinner

It was a small birthday dinner for the man at home with a handful of people who "grew up" with him. These days we are looking at "growing old" together.

Anyway.

Because it was very low-key, there was none of the rah rah hoopla paraphernalia of a birthday dinner.

Because some courses were cooked the day before, I totally forgot about the side of potatoes. (Thankfully the meal was saved by serving up home made bread to take the place of carbs).

Because the man wanted apple crumble pie instead of cake there was no cake decoration or candle to remind me of the occasion.

And so when the woman guest pointedly announced that she and husband had to be leaving soon (i.e. could we finish the evening quickly by trotting out the dessert pronto) I totally forgot what all the other lovely people were there for besides dinner.

It was only this morning that I realized there was no mention of the man's birthday at the dinner table last night.

It was still a lovely birthday dinner with good friends.

And there will be a few more get-togethers with the others who couldn't join us last night.

We will have our chance to make the proper Happy Birthday noises yet :)

His birthday with the friends

His birthday is quite some time away yet. But because someone is going to be away on the day, the friends went ahead and turned their dinner party into a birthday occasion for the man.

We did not expect this. We were getting together because it was the first weekend that all of us were going to be in one place. We negotiated who was to bring what, and ended up agreeing that the friends will take care of dessert. Which turned out to be a lovely homemade fresh orange cake with candy birthday decoration.

We have shared happy times in the past few years, we have plans for more to come. Their thoughtfulness on an occasion like this makes me grateful we have cultivated the friendship, and we have every wish to see it grow.

ps to the friend - PR baju cantek on both of them :)

December

was the month
- I did the most baking of any other time I can think of in recent history. It was a real pleasure to rediscover the therapeutic value of baking. And an even greater joy to see the happiness on friends' faces when presented with the finished product.

- I must have voiced my frustration at some of my baking attempts so much that fellow blogger and friend Bunny pointed me to her friend's delightful baking blog. My baking skills and ambition is nowhere near this woman's - hers is the type of creation that puts a BIG smile on anyone's face:)

- I finally found the resolve to "dump" people who frustrate me with their selfish and unkind words and deeds. I don't think they even know that they cease to matter to me. I don't think it matters to them anyway.

- I had the most number of dinners with and for friends. It is good to see them again.

- I closed out the year with a much better and healthier frame of mind and celebrated the end of another year with close friends and family who made me who I am.

I wish every one of my readers a very happy 2010.

He turned 70

It is difficult to think the uncle turned 70 on Christmas Eve. He is every child's favourite uncle - always cheerful, always kind, always happy to take the child to the playground, always ready with a handy treat.

There has been many stumbling blocks to happiness in his life that included an irrationally critical sister-in-law (Mother), a demanding older brother (Father). Mostly, it was having to live with, deal with, and in later years, care for, a strict and old fashioned father who demanded absolutely obedience.

Whatever the hardships, the uncle kept his peace and silence. Today, the old patriarch is gone. The uncle's own children are grown, married and have children of their own. The nephews and nieces he so fondly helped to care for are mostly married with grown children.

The uncle looked content. Happy. At peace. Proud of his brood. Still looking after the family's young children whenever they needed babysitting.

He will forever be my favourite uncle. And I am very, very happy for him on this, his special day which he celebrated with all every family member who could come.

I wish him many more happy and good years ahead.

Another year over

So this is Christmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun

John Lennon
Happy Christmas, 1971

A lot actually.

I got rid of useless emotional baggage and feel no guilt. And after an appropriate grieving period, I feel no pain.

And because my load is lighter, I now have the luxury of giving more time and care to the things/people that matter.

I am happier than I have been for a long time.

That is a lot I have done, actually.