I don't like the woman

I didn't like the woman way back when.

I didn't like the woman through the years.

So I haven't seen the woman for the last few years.

Two months ago, I heard she was diagnosed with advanced brain cancer, was being treated with chemotherapy and radiation, and was not expected to live beyond 15 months.

I felt badly for her. But I did nothing about trying to contact her - she lives and works out of the country, and comes back frequently on weekends.

She was back all last week, staying at a friend's home. Said friend called me to come over for dinner with the woman.

I told myself to be nice, hold my tongue, smile and nod in sympathy and agreement.

She is still ever the loud-mouthed shameless self-promoter I disliked from way back when. All night, I listened to the woman tell me how great a person she is - as a helpful friend, a hot lover, a doting mother, a filial daughter, a long-suffering wife (twice), an understanding ex-wife (twice), a dedicated employee, a pious person etc etc etc.

I held my tongue, I smiled and nodded in sympathy. I was nice.

At the end of the evening, I felt sad.

For her - because I'd like to think there are many people who really and truly like her, but I have serious doubts about that.

For myself - because I am probably seeing her for the last time. And I still do not like the woman.

I look forward to this

I still look forward to this.Not the factory sale, per se. I love Paul Ropp creations, but I have p-l-e-n-t-y Paul Ropp clothes in my closet; I still have several in their original wrapping. I have also not come back with big hauls the last few times. Maybe Paul Ropp's creative genius has taken off in a different direction and I am just too stubborn to go along.Yet, I still look forward to this.

It is an opportunity to see some dear friends who will never travel anywhere. It is also a walk down memory lane, back to youthful days of living and loving fearlessly. I still recall watching the stunning sunsets, as the lover and I talked of possibilities of being this happy forever, together.

Many wishes and dreams from those days have come to pass. The Bohemian spirit in me still awakes on that island. For as long as I still feel all this, I look forward to revisiting Bali. For the friends, the memories, the unbeaten free spirit.

Yes, I still look forward to this.

Night of Wine and Dine

Bottom left picture - from left:
Pathy (sommelier, Table@7)
Daniel Chathiard (owner, Chateau Smith Haut Lafitte)
Eugenia & Karl (owners, Table@7)
Clinton Ang (owner, Cornerstone Wines)

It is a stretch to find me at wine-pairing dinners. For the simple reason that I am allergic to alcohol.

But because it is the folks at Table@7 who asked.

And because we have fond memories of our dinner at the Chateau Smith-Haut Lafitte.

We went.

It was, of course, another thoroughly enjoyable evening at our favourite restaurant, with some of our favourite people in the F&B industry...

October

was the month
I took a short break, in of all places, China.

Specifically, Beijing and Harbin. More of that later.

I have also taken the time to sort out myself. Specifically, to sort out my relationship with various people.

Everyone out there is either (a) my-type-of-people and we get along famously from the first, or (b) not my-type-of-people, but having evolved into the "nice" person I want to be, I "find" reasons to accept these people.

Of the (b) category people, I now know in myself that it is a lost cause to make unacceptable people acceptable. So I leave them behind (figuratively and literally).

And that does not make me "un-nice".